Tired of seeing wedding pictures?

Well, tough shit!  Go somewhere else then, 'cause I waited a long time to get married, and it was really, really fun, and you can suck it if you think I'm going to stop throwing this shit up here any time soon!  Just kidding... sort of... not really at all.  Yeah, it's a little blurry, but if you were drinking our custom wedding drink, the "Ready or Knot", you'd be a little blurry too!

And now, the part in which I'm a whiny little bitch:

So, here's the poll question of the day...  Do you expect to get a gift from people who were invited but didn't come to the wedding?  How about a card?  What about people who did come to the wedding?  What about people who came to the wedding but didn't have to travel on a plane or stay in a hotel?  I didn't really think much about it until yesterday.

Here's a dirty little secret of mine:  I'm obsessed with Cosmo Radio on Sirius Satellite.  When I took the job doing home health, I invested in satellite radio to keep me from being bored stiff as I drive around God's green acres here in Podunk, Virginia.  I've gone through spurts of listening to different stations.  First country, then 90s on 9, 80s on 8, Love Songs, Morning Mashup, then it was the comedy channels, and now?  Oh baby, now it's all about Cosmo Radio.  Siriusly.  (Get it?  Sirius satellite?  That's a joke!)  I have NEVER listened to any form of talk radio.  EVER.  It makes me slightly nauseated, actually.  But I love Cosmo Radio.  And to top it all off, one of the hosts (Taylor) is getting married in August, and she's hysterical, if not a little Bridezilla-ish, and it freakin' cracks me up!  She does a segment called "The Almost Hitched Bitch"  (which, yes, I stole for a post down below) and another called "Don't do it Gal!".  I mean, this is good, clean radio!  Well, sometimes clean, anyway.  The morning show, Wake Up With Taylor, is hosted by 3 people, Taylor, Victoria, and Kenny.  Hilarious, I tell you, and sometimes very serious.  It's very cool.

So yesterday they were talking about various wedding etiquette things, and what was "proper".  The group was debating whether or not you have to send a gift if you do not attend a wedding to which you were invited.  Victoria, who is regarded as the Miss Manners of the bunch, and Taylor, the soon to be bride, were of differing opinions.  Victoria said you send one no matter what.  Taylor said if you don't go, you don't have to send one.   Now, most of the people invited to our wedding were able to come.  We did get a few gifts from a few people who weren't able to come, but haven't from the others.  I'm actually more surprised that we haven't even received a card from some of the people who weren't able to come.  I didn't really expect a gift, but I guess I did expect some kind of acknowledgement beyond the RSVP with regrets.

Also surprising?  The number of people that came to the wedding and didn't bring a card.  Once again, we didn't expect a gift from everyone.  Really, I just replaced my entire household after the fire, so it's not like we really need more towels or sheets (though we did put sheets on the registry), and we're merging two complete households.  We had written in the invitation that we would have a small registry, but that considering the distance that people would have to travel and expenses they would incur, that having them join our celebration was gift enough, and we meant it!  But I was surprised that a lot of the local people didn't even bring a card.

Admission #1:  I've not sent cards for lots of weddings.  I know that.  LOTS.  I've been IN lots of weddings that I've not brought a gift to because I was freakin' broke and in college or grad school and couldn't afford a dress, shoes, travel and a gift, so unless I was going dressless or shoeless, you weren't getting a gift.  Now that I'm older and wiser, I have the hindsight to know that I should have put stickers on a piece of notebook paper and written "Congratulations" on it.

Admission #2:  I just realized that when I got back into my apartment after the fire, I totally saw Jeff and Megan's wedding gift that I had bought and not sent (after their wedding)!  That means that I am guilty of having also gone to a wedding and not taken a card or gift.  Shitballs, Batman!  Note to self:  Quit being a shithead, go replace that gift ('cause I know I can still get it) and haul me and PB to Greensboro for a hand-delivery.

Thoughts, please.

I feel/felt pretty, oh so pretty...

My newest favoritest picture of me... now if I could only airbrush on lipstick...

Happy Father's Day!

My Hero!

Kiss the Bride!

No, wait, YOU I'LL kiss the bride!

Great googly moogly, we're disgustingly happy!

So, instead of getting married on the beautiful dock, by the beautiful lake that had been beautifully decorated by my beautiful mother and father, we got married on the dance floor of the pavilion.  Thanks to a freak storm on a 93 degree day where the chance of rain was 30%, we had to completely change plans less than 30 minutes before the wedding.  Friends and family pushed tables aside to make an aisle while my sister and a retired Marine barked orders to widen here, pull chairs over there, and my friends and their children put place cards down and replaced wine glasses.

I had spent the majority of the morning working on my sunburn while cutting flowers with Goose and Student! so the arrival of a freak thunderstorm kind of surprised all of us. 

Thankfully, though, everything came together, and while it wasn't exactly as we planned, it was exactly perfect.  And after the storm, the rain stopped, the temperature cooled down, and we had lovely weather again.  Actually, it was perfect for the invisible jump rope!  If Ma King makes Neil a pie, you might just be able to see it on YouTube...

And so it begins... I'm off today, and starting the mad dash of errands to be run, things to do, stuff to clean, and massive lists to be accomplished. Thank you sweet baby Jesus for giving me the best 2 parents, most fantastic family, and a host of characters that show up every time I need help! Even Pooh King and the cats are being extra helpful today by not knocking over everything I start.

Several years ago Mom gave me a little hangy thing that says, "Be bold and mighty forces will come to your aid." Well, I made sure that little hangy thing came out of the apartment after the fire. The saying has held true for me time after time, and I'm counting on it again this week as I count on my amazing cast of characters to help me get things ready for the wedding. I wish I could have invited everyone, but alas, we just didn't hit the lotto in time. We do thank you all for your best wishes, and I can't wait to share the stories of what went right, and what went wrong... 'cause really, there are some feral black kittens running around outside, and we all know I don't believe in black kittens being bad luck!

Um, no. No eloping.

Yep, that's what I said.  No eloping.  And people should just stop talking to me about it.  Seriously.

If you had any idea how many people have told me that we should just go elope and save ourselves the hassle.  Really, the hassle?  Ironically, most of the people who have suggested that are, in fact, not invited to our  wedding.

I was never the little girl who spent hours staring at wedding dresses, imagining what kind I would have.  I didn't pick out engagement rings and leave them lying around as hints for PB.  I had no idea what my wedding colors would be, and in fact, PB picked ours.  The one thing I knew about my wedding?  That I wouldn't elope.  That I couldn't get married without my family and best friends there.  That even if we didn't have any money, if it happened in our back yard, if I wore a sundress instead of a gown, that I would have a wedding where my Dad walked me down the aisle, my Mom loaned me earrings, and my brother and sister would stand with me.  My Mom would help me plan, and insist on buying things when the budget ran dry, telling me she wanted them for herself and would loan them to me for use during the reception because she knew that's what I really wanted to make it just right.  Thanks Mom.  My best friends would be there, flying in from all corners of the country.  My Dad and I would dance to Kenny Rogers.  We would laugh and dance and sing and act silly for as many hours or days as we had.  These things mean something to me.  The people who are there, they are meaningful.  The memories we will make will stay with me forever.  Things will go wrong.  I expect this.  I'll be disappointed if everything goes smoothly, because there won't be anything to tell "horror stories" about in years to come... but don't get me wrong, I hope they're small things.

So please, don't tell me I should elope to save on money and hassle.  Don't tell me you hope your kids won't trouble you with the details of a wedding.  Don't do that unless you don't value the relationships and memories that are made at things like this.  I didn't invite everyone and their brother.  There wasn't room or money to invite anyone but the closest of the close.  The A+ of the A list.  Only a few people can't make it.  More people are making the trek than I assumed would.  And I can't wait to see every one of them.

I don't think there's such a thing as eloping with 135 of your closest peeps because you just couldn't imagine it any other way.