5:30am- up with the chickens. Feed the cat. Walk the dog. Suck down first cup of coffee. Open eyes.
6:00am- eat breakfast. Make lunch.
6:30am- shower. Mmmmmm, shower.
7:00am- second cup of coffee down the hatch. Hair and makeup in process.
7:30am- now-coveted-extra-third-cup-of-coffee in travel mug for emergency use on way to work. Final walk of dog.
7:40am- begin commute to work
7:45am- Arrive at work, put lunch in fridge, check schedule of patients.
8-11:00am- full patient load. No downtime.
11:00- patient no-shows. Spend some gratis time with a patient who technically doesn't see PT due to idiotic insurance company, but really does see PT because my boss is cool and I'm nice... and patient deserves it.
11:30- spend time with coworkers deciding where to order lunch out since the stuff we brought seems too boring for Friday.
12-1:00pm- pick orthotist's brain about a better brace to put on f'ankle (my new name for my f'ing sore sloppy noisy ankle), eat lunch... very exciting buffalo wings... and shoot the bull with coworkers. Very fun.
1:00pm- pain in the ass patient comes (despite my attempts at controlling the universe and making him cancel) but must have smoked up (the wacky weed) before coming because is not only pleasant but downright chatty. Work my ass off with Paper Boy attempting to get said patient to be able to stand up straight.
2:00pm- spend the hour figuring out why patient is having shoulder pain then attempting to explain it to her and her husband, using skeleton. Doesn't go well, but in the end, patient and husband have their "a-ha" moment and get it. Are very excited to come back to PT for treatment.
3:15pm- Get started late with next patient, but is okay since don't have a 4:00 patient. Should be done with all paperwork by 5:00.
4:15pm- Patient left. Paperwork started. Noisy front office due to capital budget due by 5:00.
4:45pm- Definitely not going to get done by 5. But neither is front office. Should be done by 5:15.
5:15pm- Not done yet, but closing in on the finish line. Still noisy in front office. Lots of laughter. Cheering.
5:30pm- contemplate leaving. Don't want to take chart home. Don't want to have work to do Monday morning. Front office quiet. Must be crunch time for everyone.
5:45pm- Aaaaaahhhh, done with paperwork. Desk clean. Carry charts to front office. Holy shit, the lights are off. No sound coming from front office.
5:46pm- Holy crap. I'm alone. In the clinic. Everyone left. They didn't even say goodbye.
5:50pm- Sweet jesus. The doors are locked. THE CLINIC DOORS ARE LOCKED! And I'm on the inside, and, well, everything else is on the outside.
5:51pm- PANIC!!! I CAN'T GET OUT!!!! Is there no mercy?!?!?! It's FRIDAY! AND I CAN'T GET OUT!!!
5:52pm- It can't get that bad, there has to be a phone list around here somewhere. Must figure out where the lights are first.
5:53pm- Holy crap I can't find a phone list. Or the light switch.
5:54pm- Cling to glass door, attempting to get ballerinas-in-training from dance studio next door to go get their mommies to help me.
5:55pm- See the back-view of 4 terrified tu-tus.
5:56pm- slide down glass door in despair. Contemplate calling 911 to get out of office.
5:57pm- Look down in despair. Realize I have a key attached to my nametag.
5:58pm- realize that it's the master key to all office doors. Including the clinic entrance door.
5:59pm- Key out of clinic, looking sheepishly at previously mentioned ballerinas-in-training, and go to car.
Geeze. I could really go for a drink and a two-step right about now. It's 5 o'clock somewhere, but it's later than that here!
7 comments:
At 5:59 pm I was getting a spoonful of sweet potatoes hurled at me...
at 5:59 i was on my 18th medical terminology notecard
Too much peroxide? ... =) Just kidding! I know the feeling of panic, got locked in the bathroom stall my first day at my 2nd job location! We swear its haunted!
Just like the blone lady who asked me how she was going to get into her car b/c her automatic door lock wasn't working. I asked her if her car still used a key to start and she might want to try it in the door lock. Ok she was a brunette. Love you look for me on tv at the pitt msu game.
5:59 I was getting to my car to go home.
Technically, for the record, at 5:02, Paper Boy did say goodbye to Crack Whore, was promptly ignored by her and majority of others in office except for Metal Head, who proceeded to give him the "high-five" prior to his attempt to leave (curiously, no "Devil Horns" hand signs were displayed).
However, his attempts to rescue Crack Whore would have been in vain should she have called his cell phone, since he is apparently too new (or too untrustworthy) to possess a key to said office.
Still, he would have been willing to come and stand on other side of glass to keep Crack Whore entertained, much like the families of the incarcerated on visitation day (minus the tu-tu, unless Crack Whore was really into that).
Of course, ironically enough, at 5:59, Paper Boy was indeed in a tu-tu...and a Ms. Nevada banner.
Alas, that is another story.
My apologies, Paper Boy. Will definitely keep your tu-tu wearing entertainment capacity in mind for future use. Will stop ignoring you right away.
I, too, have been locked in the docs office. Luckily, it was my shrink. I waited in fetal position for her.
I'm sure it was part of my therapy.
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